It's been a while since I blogged. My sincerest apologies.
Speaking of apologies... Last winter I learned an important lesson about the power of apologizing that I've been thinking about lately. I had been carrying an attitude towards some (one) of my coworkers that, when stressed, was being manifest in a tone of voice unfitting for a child of God. I was already aware of the problem but felt stuck on how to get out of it since, unfortunately, it had become a pattern and an expected norm and, by the world's standards, was even justified at times.
Through a friend (not yet a believer) the Holy Spirit convicted me of the way I was speaking. We had also been talking at SOTW about cleaning up the messes we make. ("It's okay to make a mess as long as you fully clean it up." That is, make it right with every person the mess touched. The faster you catch a mess and clean it up, the smaller the distance it will spread and the less clean up you have to do.) Anyways, I knew I wanted to make it right but for whatever reason wasn't sure how to change the pattern of behaviour. It seems pretty obvious now, but I am convinced it was a Holy Spirit moment of inspiration when I realized all I needed to do was apologize. And I needed to apologize publicly to the whole team (everyone who had been touched by the mess.)
I have to say it took a little bit of courage to make the apology to the team but I did it. Once the Spirit shows you how to walk, it's pretty difficult/stupid not to follow. The result is incredible when I think about how the way relationships that were once strained are now bearing fruit.
Anyways. All this is to say I learned a lesson about how quickly a simple "I'm sorry for..." can turn a situation. Sometimes that's all you need from someone - an acknowledgement that they missed it and they want to make it right. I vowed to become someone known for being quick to apologize. I want to become faster and faster at recognizing when I am wrong and saying something about it. I'm not talking about the Canadian "Sorry" that we utter at the most ridiculous situations (e.g. Sorry random chair/couch/tree that I ran into you..)but when it is necessary, genuine heart felt apologies for an attitude that is wrong, or words that were harsh.
I still have lots to learn but I've been remembering this lesson recently and reminding myself of my decision to be a woman who is quick to take responsibility by saying "I'm sorry." Two simple words really can make all the difference.
