work

There is something satisfying about working hard and seeing something accomplished as a result. I was thinking a bit about the difference between work and toil today as I helped the McKinnons put new flower beds into their yard.

We were created to work. Work is meant to be satisfying and productive. God created Adam and put him to work tending the garden. He had a job to do with a goal of extending it to the ends of the earth. I imagine Adam worked hard. But he worked hard on the things God had given him to do and in the way God taught him to do it, and therefore it was productive and satisfying. We were not made to toil. Toil is putting in a lot of effort without much result. (Well that is my definition.) This is what the dictionary says about toil: to engage in hard and continuous work; labor arduously. It implies difficulty and pain.

Today we worked hard but the results were satisfying. Now I am ready to rest.

love

A colleague of mine has been trying various online dating sites for the last few months, going on date after date looking for the right guy. Understandably, she is getting tired of going on all these dates just to find she doesn't like him...or he doesn't like her.

In the last few months I have thought a bit about this thing that she, like so many others, is doing: searching for someone to love her. I am thankful that in my life I don't have to do that. I already know the love of God in my life and that is the only love that will ever be able to fully satisfy. God has been showing me that the love one receives from a spouse is simply another channel for his love to flow through. God is love and all love is in him. That means that any love I receive from another person originates in him. And while we all need people who will love us, and I do want a partner one day, I do not have a void in my heart that I am seeking some person to fill.

There is a video series from my childhood called "The Doughnut Man". The theme song from this show has been playing around in my head for several weeks now. It goes like this:

"Life without God's love is like a doughnut 'cause there's a hole in the middle of your heart."

This is the basic message I have been waiting to share with my colleague. I am praying and looking for the right opportunity but so far I haven't had "the in". I have decided to be quite honest about my own life in terms of relationships, dating, etc. recognizing that whatever happens, I know will have walked it out with God and it will be a testimony of Him in my life that is quite practical for her (and the others in the office) and quite different from her own experience.

This colleague is one with whom I didn't hit things off beautifully right from the beginning. I have worked hard at building our relationship. Today I was encouraged. She moved into the same neighbourhood as me a few months ago and so today as I was describing a recent walk to the river, she said "I was thinking that you and I should take a walk to the river sometime." This was a bit unexpected but I was encouraged by it because to me it is a sign that, to some extent anyways, I have won her trust and she is ready to talk about something...


Lord prepare her heart to receive you. May she become increasingly uncomfortable with the way she is currently living her life so that she recognizes her need for your love.

grounded

In the last few weeks, for a variety of probable reasons, my body has been telling me I am anxious even though I don't find I am actively "worrying" about anything. I've had trouble sleeping, my stomach has been upset, etc. It has felt like I was unstable. Not emotionally unstable, but just like my feet weren't firmly planted on anything solid. The peace that grounds you when circumstances swirl seemed to be absent from my life.

Anyways. Last night, this verse came to me and it is what I am going to be thinking about today:

"For this this reason I bow my knees before the Father...that according to the riches of his glory he may grant you to be strengthened with power through his Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith - that you, being rooted and grounded in love, may have strength to comprehend with all the saints what is the breadth and length and height and depth, and to know the love of Christ that surpasses knowledge, that you may be filled with all the fullness of God." (Eph 3:14-19)

I am rooted and grounded in love.

weird

Last Sunday during the meeting, Todd Pulisfer said something that stuck with me all week. It wasn't directly related to the message, but I'm glad he threw it in there:

"They already think you are weird, why not start acting like it?"

I don't like to be considered weird. I have gone to great lengths to demonstrate how normal I am. It's just that...well, it's not working.

This week at Chapters I picked up a little book in the 'Christianity' section called "Weird". It challenges this very notion of trying to be normal when Jesus and the Kingdom He preached are anything but ordinary.

I don't know how weird "they" think I am. (For me "they" is primarily those I work with who see me close up day after day.) Likely, they know I am different, but they don't know the specifics of what that means in my life. What I want is for them to not just think I am strange, but to notice the weirdness and find it attractive. I want them to see my life is different from theirs but in a positive way. Attractively weird, if you will.

So I am just starting, but this week I talked about some personal things I wouldn't normally...things I am walking through that are "normal" things, that I know I will walk through differently than they would simply because of the work Christ has already done in me. I will try to talk about how I make decisions, what I do with my time, etc.

I guess they will go on thinking I am strange unless I show proof of something alternative.

anxious

Anxious about a delicate conversation I need to have today that I would rather not. A friend counselled me to "resist every urge to be nice and just be clear". Boo.

God, thank you for your peace and for your love. Thank you that my identity is secure in you. I have nothing to be afraid of because I am perfectly loved by you.

update

The little guy mentioned in the previous post passed away last night. Today I found out he was the third of a set of quadruplets to pass. One remains (healthy). I can't quite imagine what that does to a family... so if you think of them, please continue to pray.

I am asking God to make this situation into one that turns those involved to Him. I will also seek to show the love of God to Angela in practical ways.

These things are not right. They should not happen.

please pray

Please pray for the nephew of a girl I work with. He is 18 months old and dying of cancer. He is expected to die in the next few days. When I told my friend, Angela, that I would be praying, she asked me to pray that he will die soon.

I just can't do that. Instead, please pray that there is a miraculous healing and life restored to that family.

thanks.

history of grace

At ANC Ottawa, we have been talking a lot about grace. I am still asking God to really get this into me. We have also had a number of evangelists around, who are doing their thing, stirring up and equipping the body to evangelize.

These two things combined for me last week, when Orlando was teaching our life group, in detail, about how to plant a house church (Cuban style). The question came up about those who are gifted as evangelists (and those who are not!) This is how he responded:

Every one of us has a responsibility to share our history of grace in a really natural way with the people we interact with everyday. Some people also have a gift of evangelism, or a ministry of evangelism...

It could be how it came across in translation, but I like the way he phrased it. Each of us has a responsibility to share our "history of grace". That is, our story about the grace of God in our lives.

Trent Anderson preached yesterday about the implications of a grace-based Kingdom (as opposed to the kingdom of the world which is performance-based). One of the implications is that the grace we find in Jesus Christ is our power and our strength (2 Tim 2:1). Trent pointed out that our power, as Christians, is not based on our gifts. It is not based on what we have done. It is based only on His grace. This is what will change situations and lives - when we rely on the power of grace in our lives.

like a child

Today I had the pleasure of holding the lovely little Heather during worship. I think Heather is about three... She is a little girl with big insight...at times I have even found that she will say something in a particular way that seems to have a prophetic edge. So today I was worshiping and she was all snuggled up in my arms. Every once in a while she'd ask a question (what's on your arm, why are you wearing earrings, etc.) At one point during worship I began to pray in tongues...pretty normal. When I finished, Heather asked "How did you learn that?". I was impressed at this question from such a young kid. I told her it was a language that Jesus gave me. She was persistent - she asked three or four times. It struck me that tongues is a powerful and wonderful gift that is clearly of God. Even a three year old can tell that it is something special. Different. It reminded me of this verse:

"Thus tongues are a sign, not for believers but for unbelievers..."
(1 Cor 14:22)

It also reminded me of when Tony Ling described waking up to hear a foreign army in the streets. People will know a new Kingdom has arrived when they hear us speaking in the language of that Kingdom.

things to remember every day

In January, Steve Wilkins preached on several things to do every day. I used what he taught to form the basis of a "cheat sheet" that I used every morning for a while. It is not overly profound but contains some simple (important) truth. I haven't been using it quite as regularly because much of it got ingrained in me and my daily routine changed. However I think I might start again, because it was a helpful habit.

Today someone in the church remembered that I had done this, and asked me to share a copy with her. I thought I would share it a bit wider in case it will be of help to anyone else. There are a few personal bits in there that should probably change, but if it can be of use to you, feel free to make it your own. (Note that the format is a little bit off...)

Here it is:


Day by Day with You. Ps 92, Php 4:13

* Remember the things God did yesterday. Thank him. Who can I tell? (Ps 105:1)

* Thank Him (Praise) for:

- another day
- a wonderful apartment
- a family who loves me
- my job
- the opportunity for SOTW
- who He is (good, loving, faithful, generous,…)
- What He has done (saved me, HS, new life,restored joy …)
-
-

* Remember that today I choose to:
- Die: It is not all about me. (Gal 2:20, Rom 6:6-7)
- Live: I am alive through the Spirit (Rom 8:11)
- Laugh: It is not so serious. I have been given joy. (Ps 16:11, 2 Cor 3:17, Rom 14:17)

* Thank you God that you give me everything I need for TODAY:
- Mercy (Lam 3:22)
- Grace and Sufficiency (2 Cor 9:8, 12:9)
- Power and Strength (Ps 68:35)
- Self Control (2 Tim 1:7)
- Steadfast love that lasts all day (Ps 52:1 ESV, Ps 90:14)
-Salvation (Ps 68:19)
- Acceptance: I am perfectly loved. I have nothing to fear. (1 John 4:18)
- Love for others (1 Thess 4: 9, 1 John 3:18, 1 Thes 5:11) Is there anyone specifically you want to love-on today, Lord? Is there anyone who you would like to encourage through me?

*Thank you that you hear me when I pray (1 John 5:14-15) I also want to pray for:
- people from school
- people at work
- my family
- Allison and Isak
- other couples
- friends
- my husband
- our leaders (church, government, world)
- Christians facing persecution
- Cuba
-
-

*As I read your word, please teach me, shape me, reveal Jesus to me.

God I give you all of me. All of my day. I love you. I need you. I can’t do it on my own. I want to be in step with your Spirit and full of your life everywhere I go. Give me wisdom. Direct my steps. Help me to discern truth and speak things that are helpful for building others up. Show me the things of Heaven and help me bring them to earth today. Thank you, Lord.

sharing life

In Ottawa we have had the privilege of hosting Rafael's friend, Orlando, from Cuba. Orlando was an architect who gave it up to see people saved (and plant churches). He has been equipping the body here to get out to the streets and share the good news of Christ by teaching at Sunday meetings and in the life groups. Our life group in particular has spent several evenings with Orlando - teaching, praying, and getting out on the streets.

One thing I love most about this is that our relationship with the church in Cuba has now started to be reciprocal. We have talked as a board for the "Share Life Without Borders" NGO about to establish this reciprocal type relationship with people that we are helping so as to avoid the mentality that we can help you, but you have nothing to offer to us.

When we go into Cuba to teach and equip, it is always obvious to me that, while there are things we carry a revelation on that we can share to benefit those we meet, there are areas where they are way ahead of us... Right now, in Ottawa, we are benefiting from the things that God has already shown them. Fabulous!